I'm not a drama queen, but...

I’m not a drama queen, but deep down there is woman who is moaning, crying and screaming get out.

I have an image in my mind what must be the best stress relieving activity known on this rotten earth. I would like to stand in front of the kitchen sink with a vase full of at least a dozen beautiful, red, long stem roses. And one by one grind their heads off in the garbage disposal.

But I’m not a spurned lover. Instead I have to make do with what I have, namely, the office shredder.

It’s been a harried week, lemme tell ya. The bookkeeping beat me up for two days straight. It beat me up last week too. It takes up so much of my mental bandwidth when I try to mess with it and it just puts me on the verge of tears. My mind isn't bent in that direction - I am good at advertising and I suck at bookkeeping.

Unfortunately it's been a particular clusterfuck the last few weeks because of invoicing errors. Verifying details, splitting costs, weeks ending, activity code, job location, blah blah blah.

Could anything be more dull? Infuriating? Maddening?

Anyway...the office shredder. When I was researching shredders, I found models that would actually chew up cds and stacks of papers. I didn't get that one, but my little gutless wonder does just fine for what I need it for:

Abercrombie and Fitch postcard - die, you skinny bitches!
Visa Gold Credit application - back from whence you came, devil spawn!
Phone message from the annoying insurance lady - I got your dental plan right here!
Invoice #5213 - confetti for you, buddy.

Sometimes it's just the little things that make me feel better.